If the reader is imagining that BQ in this case stands for “Boston Qualifying”, then I, of course, am completely full of fecal matter. If, however, I am granted a bit of leeway with these letters, then I feel confident in stating that I did BQ today, again and again.

First and foremost, on multiple occasions today I Behaved Queerly. Case in point: In the midst of the constant stream of angry muttering, singing and cursing that I engage in whilst running, I saw a fellow runner wearing a GLER hat. (M. and I ran the Green Lakes Endurance Run, a fantastic but exhausting 50K, this past summer.) I was very excited to see someone, albeit a total stranger, who had also done this run, and so I maniacally yelled “GLER!! GLER!! GLER!!!” whilst pointing insistently and jabbing at my head. I imagined that I’d see a look of camaraderie on said runner’s face when he saw that I was sporting the same hat , but instead I just saw fear/revulsion. Could be because I was NOT wearing my GLER hat, but, instead, my trusty, crusty army hat. Oops. Sorry, Runner-Who-I-Frightened.

Another example of my stellar ability to BQ today: Beverage Quaffing. Today I drank dozens and dozens of cups of water and Gatorade (although I did reject the beer offered near Mile 24 by the tie-dyed raucous drunkards.) If there was a medal given for the most beverages quaffed I would surely be the only logical recipient. Ha! In your face, you lesser consumers!!

A shameful example of today’s BQ: Big Quitter. It’s sad, but true that today I basically threw in the towel. I pride myself on being mentally if not physically tough, but today’s events proved that that is absolutely not the case. When it got painful and I grew tired, I allowed myself to walk. And of course the more I walked, the more unlikley it became that I would meet my goal. By Mile 13, I knew I’d not BQ, but I still imagined a PR was in my future. By Mile 20, I knew the PR was not likely, so I merely hoped to finish in less than four hours. Big Quitter that I am, I didn’t even accomplish that. I Bonked Quickly, people.

Another BQ: Beneficent Quartet. OK, so technically we are not a quartet as H. is living abroad, and M. is soon on to greener pastures, but in the unlikely event that we could all assemble on the same continent to run a race, then Team Yonker is a force with which to be reckoned. J. and M. were awesome today, handily meeting their half marathon goal. They inspire, train and encourage me, all the while protecting my cowardly ass from fierce dogs and graciously giving me the solo hotel bed. I lurve you guys!

Which leads me to my last and final BQ: Beastly Quandry. Should I even bother to continue the running madness? Is it even sane to devote so much time and energy in an attempt to meet a goal that may be completely unattainable for me? Because frankly, when I think about how much time I’ve spent over the past 18 weeks, I get a Bit Queasy.